The Sick Note


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Verse 1:	Dear Sir I write this note to inform you of my plight
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		And at the time of writing I am not a pretty sight
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		My body is all black and blue, my face a deadly gray
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		I write this note to tell why Paddy's not at work today


Verse 2:	While working on the fourteenth floor, some bricks I had to clear
		And to throw them down from off the top seemed quite a good idea
		But the foreman wasn't very pleased, he beeing an awful sod
		He said I had to cart them down the ladder in me hod

Verse 3: 	Well, clearing all these brick by hand, it seemed so very slow
		So I hoisted up a barrel and secured the rope below
		But in my haste to do the job, I was too blind to see
		That a barrel full of building bricks isd heavier than me

Verse 4:	So when I had untied the rope, the barrel fell like lead
		And clinging tightly to the rope I started up instead
		I took off like a rocket and to my dismay I found
		That halfway up I met the bloody barrel coming down

Verse 5:	Well the barrel broke my shoulder as on to the ground it sped
		And when I reached the top I banged the pulley with my head
		I held on tight, though numb with shock from this almighty blow
		And the barrel spilled out half its load fourteen floors below

Verse 6:	Now when those building bricks fell from the barrel to the floor
		I then outweighed the barrel so I started down once more
		I held on tightly to the rope as I flew to the ground
		And I landed on those broken bricks that were all scattered round

Verse 7:	Now as I lay there on the deck I thought I'd passed the worst
		But when the barrel reached the top, that's when the bottom burst
		A shower of bricks came down on me, I knew I had no hope
		In all of this confusion, I let go the bloody rope

Verse 8:	The barrel being heavier, it started down once more
		And landed right on top of me as I lay on the floor
		It broke three ribs and my left arm, and I can only say
		That I hope you'll understand why Paddy's not at work today